January 2, 2020 0
Rinpoche had a different kind of relationship with Dorje Shugden. It was a special kind of relationship, like Dorje Shugden was a father, brother, friend, guardian, guru all rolled into one. In private moments, Rinpoche would converse with Dorje Shugden, speaking as he would to a friend; when we had the privilege of being there, we witnessed Rinpoche speaking with genuine affection, love, respect, care, awe and humility. There were times when Rinpoche expressed joy to Dorje Shugden, when Rinpoche thanked Dorje Shugden, when Rinpoche cried to Dorje Shugden, when Rinpoche confided in his Protector in the same way we would confide in our best friends.
Rinpoche always spoke to Dorje Shugden as though he was there (which, of course, he is), and always treated Dorje Shugden as though he was real (which, of course, he is). For example, after some contemplation, Rinpoche at one time concluded what foods Tulku Drakpa Gyaltsen would have been served during his lifetime. After that, Rinpoche instructed the Ladrang (a lama’s household) for daily offerings to be made to Dorje Shugden with foods that he would have enjoyed as Tulku Drakpa Gyaltsen.
Then there was the use of “Lama Dorje Shugden”. I have never heard anyone else refer to Dorje Shugden in that way but that is how Rinpoche would often refer to Dorje Shugden in prayer and conversation.
I used to wonder what Rinpoche meant by that. Rinpoche must have known what I was thinking because one day, Rinpoche suddenly explained it to me. If memory serves, Rinpoche had just finished reciting a prayer to dedicate the merits of publishing a blog post. I was, as usual, sat on the floor next to Rinpoche’s feet, observing Rinpoche in prayer, readying myself to take the incense out of Rinpoche’s hand and place it inside the burner.
It was Rinpoche’s habit to remain perfectly still at the end of any dedication prayer. With his eyes closed, Rinpoche would silently engage in deeper meditations, recite further liturgies or verbalise his aspirations. After completing these, Rinpoche would open his eyes, hand the incense to whoever was attending at the time, and then resume whatever Rinpoche had previously been doing.
On that particular day however, Rinpoche broke the silence. Out of the blue, with his eyes closed, Rinpoche explained his many reasons for referring to Dorje Shugden as “Lama Dorje Shugden”.
For these reasons, Rinpoche said it was entirely appropriate for him to refer to Dorje Shugden as “Lama Dorje Shugden”.
During Rinpoche’s lifetime, I did not pick up any of Rinpoche’s enlightened qualities nor the majority of Rinpoche’s habits. The way Rinpoche referred to Dorje Shugden however, is one habit I am happy to do a very poor imitation of because I loved, loved, loved the way Rinpoche referred to Dorje Shugden. For someone like me who has absolutely no extra-sensory perceptions whatsoever (as sensitive as a brick wall!), referring to Dorje Shugden as “Lama Dorje Shugden” made someone I cannot directly perceive become even more real and tangible for me.
It is not until now that I can appreciate how Rinpoche harnessed the power of language to strengthen my relationship with my Dharma Protector. It was such a subtle thing – Lama Dorje Shugden versus Dorje Shugden – but it made a difference. It taught me that Dorje Shugden is not some ethereal, pie in the sky, inaccessible deity; he is real, he is present, he is here, he is now.
It also taught me that there is more than one way to rely on a Buddha. There are the prayers, rituals and liturgies, and then there are the myriad ways to reinforce your connection with them for the 23 hours you are off your meditation cushion. Do you treat them as someone very distant or as someone very close to you? Do you make a conscious effort to keep introducing their presence in your life, or do you forget about them once your prayers are over? What do you do, or what can you do, to bring them closer to you?
The impact of Rinpoche’s language on my relationship with my Protector also showed me the interconnectedness of speech and mind, and how our speech can have such tangible effects on our view of the Buddhas (and indeed, all other phenomena around us). Such are the skilful means of my teacher to bring his students closer to the Buddhas.
To my Lama, who is one with Heruka, we look forward to welcoming you home soon.
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